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Weekly Goal Setting

5 TFM - Befriend your Inner Voice

First read the General Instructions. Click here.
(and for Main Introduction, Click here)

Here’s a breakdown of goals and actions tailored to the 5th Transformation: Befriend your Inner Voice.

This Transformation aims for self-understanding. The goal is to foster acceptance of both the Voice of Insecurity and the Voice of Security, recognizing their inherent presence within oneself.

Important Note: The distinction is that Transformation 5 is about accepting it, and

  • builds on all previous Transformations: disregarding and even soaking in the negativity (Transformation 1, Ignore the Voice of Security), and entertaining it (Transformation 2, Use the Voice of Insecurity for amusement and inspiration), and boosting positivity (Transformation 3, Let the Voice of Security be your guide), just acting (Transformation 4, Act despite the Voice of Insecurity.).

Based on the Month, select your Week’s Goal

Jan - May - Sept

Main Goal: Cultivate Self-Compassion and Acceptance

Specific Actions:
– Practice mindfulness techniques to observe thoughts and emotions without judgment.
– Challenge self-criticism by acknowledging strengths and accomplishments.
– Engage in self-care activities that promote physical and emotional well-being.

Main Goal: Foster a Growth Mindset and Adaptability

Specific Actions:
– Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and learning.
– View setbacks as temporary obstacles and opportunities to develop resilience.
– Seek feedback from others to gain different perspectives and insights.

Main Goal: Develop Emotional Intelligence and Self-Awareness

Specific Actions:
– Reflect on emotional responses to different situations and identify triggers.
– Practice active listening and empathy in interactions with others.
– Seek opportunities for self-reflection and journaling to explore thoughts and feelings.

Main Goal: Strengthen Inner Resilience and Coping Strategies

Specific Actions:
– Build a support network of friends, family, or mentors to provide encouragement and guidance.
– Practice stress-reduction techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or yoga.
– Identify healthy coping mechanisms for managing stress and adversity.

Main Goal: Cultivate Gratitude and Positive Outlook

Specific Actions:
– Keep a gratitude journal to record daily blessings and moments of appreciation.
– Express appreciation to others through acts of kindness or words of affirmation.
– Reframe negative situations by focusing on silver linings and lessons learned.

Feb - June - Oct

Main Goal: Foster Authenticity and Self-Expression

Specific Actions:
– Explore personal values, passions, and interests through creative outlets such as art, writing, or music.
– Practice assertiveness by expressing thoughts, feelings, and opinions openly and honestly.
– Surround yourself with supportive individuals who accept you for who you are.

Main Goal: Cultivate Healthy Relationships and Boundaries

Specific Actions:
– Communicate openly and honestly with loved ones about needs, expectations, and boundaries.
– Set aside dedicated time for quality interactions and meaningful connections with others.
– Recognize and address toxic relationships or dynamics that undermine well-being.

Main Goal: Practice Self-Reflection and Personal Growth

Specific Actions:
– Set aside regular time for introspection and self-assessment.
– Identify areas for improvement or development and create action plans for growth.
– Celebrate progress and milestones achieved along the journey of personal growth.

Main Goal: Develop a Sense of Purpose and Meaning

Specific Actions:
– Reflect on values, passions, and long-term goals to clarify personal purpose.
– Volunteer or engage in activities that align with your interests and values.
– Seek out opportunities for connection and contribution to something larger than yourself.

Main Goal: Cultivate Self-Empowerment and Agency

Specific Actions:

– Set ambitious yet achievable goals that challenge and inspire you to take action.
– Take ownership of decisions and actions, recognizing the power of choice in shaping your life.
– Surround yourself with empowering influences and role models who inspire confidence and self-belief.

Mar - July - Nov

Main Goal:Notice without judgment: Practice tracking inner thoughts and feelings without labeling them “good” or “bad.”

Specific Actions:
-Set 3 alarms daily for a 1-minute “mindfulness check-in” – observe your thoughts.
-Try naming emotions neutrally (“There’s a tightness in my chest = anxiety”).
-Journal about noticing a negative thought, focus on its presence, not its content

Main Goal:Voice differentiation: Learn to distinguish between the Voice of Insecurity and the Voice of Security.

Specific Actions:
-Write down typical phrases from each voice, label them clearly.
-Create nicknames for your voices, making them less intimidating.
-Try visualizing your inner voices as distinct characters, note their tone/body language.

Main Goal:Roots of the voices: Explore the origins of your inner critic and inner champion.

Specific Actions:
-Think back to childhood messages that shaped your self-image.
-Make a list of people whose voices you ‘echo’ internally (parents, teachers, etc.)
-Write a letter from your critical voice, imagining what it’s trying to protect you from.

Main Goal:Compassion challenge: Counter harsh self-criticism with kindness and understanding.

Specific Actions:
-When negativity hits, imagine giving advice to a struggling friend instead.
-Talk to yourself out loud using your own name, gently, as you would to a child.
-Keep a “self-compassion note” on your phone, reread it during tough moments.

Main Goal: Inner truce practice: Find ways to soothe and negotiate with your critical voice.

Specific Actions
-“Thank” your critical voice for trying to help, then set a boundary for it.
-Imagine a safe, calming space in your mind, visit it when negativity overwhelms.
-Try a “parts dialogue” exercise – write a conversation between your voices.

Apr - Aug - Dec

Main Goal: Body connection: Learn to recognize how emotions manifest physically.

Specific Actions:
-Do a guided body scan meditation, paying attention to areas of tension.
-Draw an outline of your body, label areas where different emotions are felt.
-When stressed, focus on one sense (sight, hearing) to ground yourself in the present.

Main Goal: Inner voice journaling: Use journaling to track and process your inner dialogue.

Specific Actions
-Dedicate a journal section to your inner voices, write ‘conversations’ with them.
-Note patterns: when is each voice loudest, what triggers them, etc.
-Revisit old entries, look for signs of growth in your self-awareness.

Main Goal: Self-acceptance affirmations: Craft statements that acknowledge all parts of yourself.

Specific Actions:
-Write affirmations starting with “I accept that…” (flaws, fears, and all).
-Practice saying these aloud, even if they feel uncomfortable at first.
-Create an “acceptance reminder” on your phone, include both strengths and struggles.

Main Goal: “Good enough” mindset: Apply the concept of acceptance and progress over perfection to your inner world.

Specific Actions
-On days your inner voice is harsh, focus on being kinder than yesterday.
-Reward efforts in self-awareness, not just eliminating negativity.
-Practice reframing harsh thoughts to be realistic: “This is hard” vs. “I’m a failure.”

Main Goal: Negativity as Identity: Embrace the idea that negative thinking is who you are, vital protection from the world.

Specific Actions:
– Practice saying “I’m a naturally negative person,” let it define your interactions.
– Use cynicism as a shield, deflect positivity by predicting its inevitable demise.
– View any optimism as a weakness, pride yourself on seeing the “real” bleak truth.